So, I like to think of myself as a seasoned bull-shitter! If you ask my sister about something I told you, she would probably start laughing and tell you I just made that up! This coming from the women who believes almost everything I tell her... Being a seasoned bullshitter also means you have the much needed ability to adapt and make shit up as you go. This ability of mine ties into all aspect of my life, including food!
So, lets talk about the art of making it up in the kitchen! I am sure every single one of you has walked into your kitchen, opened the refrigerator, opened the pantry, returned to the refrigerator and still had ZERO ideas on what you were going to prepare for dinner. The first step which is the most important, is to pick a protein & a starch! So, lets say you decide on chicken and pasta... The second step is to think of your favorite chicken & pasta dishes. Lets say I choose chicken alfredo, chicken noodle soup, and chicken Parmesan Do you have ALL the ingredients you need for any of those dishes? More than likely, NO! The third step is to deconstruct your favorite dishes and create a new one. So, you have already decided on chicken and pasta. Just narrow down your options from the ingredients you have in the fridge and pantry. Lets say you have lasagna noodles, pasta sauce, and your chicken. The fourth step is to take the ingredients you chose and construct a dish. Think to yourself, how can I put this together to make this a delicious, easy meal?? My pick would be chicken lasagna roll ups! Bread your chicken and bake in the over until done, at the same time boil your noodles. Cut up the cooked chicken into slices and mix with 1/2 cup of pasta sauce. Place the mixture at the top of your cooked noodle, and roll it up. Continue this process until all your noodles are done. Place the stuffed noodles into a butter baking dish, cover with remaining pasta sauce and shredded or parm cheese and bake for 20 min! BAM! YOU DID IT!!!!!!!!!!
Friday, September 9, 2011
Friday, April 8, 2011
Great recipes, stage II
Hello there my beautiful fabbies! I hope "My Favorite Recipes" made there way into your lives with much enjoyment. If they did, WHEW HEW!!! If they didn't, well I tried and will continue to try! Starting with these next 3 recipes (in my best Bob Barker voice)!! I have also decided to add a GREAT TIP section of my blog!!
Like I mentioned in the last post, my recipes will continue to expand your confidence and experience in the kitchen. Prepare to experience awesome food and prep work you never thought you could do! YOUR TASTE BUDS WILL LOVE YOU, and hopefully your family/friends will get a little satisfaction too!
GREAT TIP - You can find pretty much anything you need at Hy-Vee, and if you cant find it just use something else thats comparable!
#6 Summer Squash/Zucchini Risotto
Filling: In a medium saucepan, bring the chicken broth and cumin to a boil over medium-high heat. Remove the pan from the heat and stir in the couscous. Cover the pan until the couscous is tender and all of the liquid has been absorbed, about 5 to 6 minutes. Put the couscous in a large bowl and add the beans, currants, spinach, feta and 1/4 cup olive oil. Season with salt and pepper, to taste. Stir until all the ingredients are combined.
Slice the tops off the peppers and remove all the ribs and seeds. If necessary, cut a very thin slice from the base to help the peppers stand up. Stuff the peppers with the filling and drizzle the tops with olive oil. Put the peppers in an 8 by 8-inch square baking dish. Fill the baking dish with 3/4-inch hot water and bake until the filling is golden and the peppers are cooked through, about 55 to 60 minutes. Cooks Note: If the filling begins to brown too quickly, cover the pan with foil.)
#8 French onion soup
Enjoy!!!
Like I mentioned in the last post, my recipes will continue to expand your confidence and experience in the kitchen. Prepare to experience awesome food and prep work you never thought you could do! YOUR TASTE BUDS WILL LOVE YOU, and hopefully your family/friends will get a little satisfaction too!
GREAT TIP - You can find pretty much anything you need at Hy-Vee, and if you cant find it just use something else thats comparable!
#6 Summer Squash/Zucchini Risotto
- 3 tablespoons olive oil, divided
- 2-3 cups 1/2-inch cubes peeled zuchinni AND summer squash (or whatever veggie you want
- diced garlic and onions (how ever much you prefer)
- 1 tablespoon chopped fresh thyme
- 2 cups arborio rice (rice isle of the grocery store)
- 4 14-ounce cans (or more) broth (chicken, beef, or veggie)
- 1 cup chopped fresh basil
- 3/4 cup freshly grated Parmesan cheese OR MORE :)
Heat 2 tablespoons oil in heavy large pot over medium-high heat. Add veggies and sauté until beginning to soften and brown around edges, about 5 minutes. Transfer veggies to medium bowl.
Reduce heat to medium; add remaining 1 tablespoon oil and thyme to same pot and stir until tender but not brown, about 5 minutes. Add rice and stir 1 minute. Add 1 cup broth and simmer until absorbed, stirring frequently, 3 to 4 minutes. Add remaining broth by 1/2 cupfuls, allowing each addition to be absorbed before adding next, stirring often, about 15 minutes. Return squash to pot. Continue to cook until rice is just tender but still very creamy, stirring gently and often, about 10 minutes longer (about 25 minutes total cooking time). Remove from heat. Stir in basil and 3/4 cup freshly grated Parmesan cheese. Season to taste with salt and pepper. Transfer to large bowl and serve with additional Parmesan cheese.
- 1 cup chicken broth
- 3/4 cup couscous
- 1 packed cup chopped baby spinach leaves
- 1/2 cup (4 ounces) crumbled feta cheese
- 1/4 cup extra-virgin olive oil, plus more for drizzling
- salt and freshly ground black pepper
- 4 peppers, any color you want
- Hot water, as needed
Filling: In a medium saucepan, bring the chicken broth and cumin to a boil over medium-high heat. Remove the pan from the heat and stir in the couscous. Cover the pan until the couscous is tender and all of the liquid has been absorbed, about 5 to 6 minutes. Put the couscous in a large bowl and add the beans, currants, spinach, feta and 1/4 cup olive oil. Season with salt and pepper, to taste. Stir until all the ingredients are combined.
Slice the tops off the peppers and remove all the ribs and seeds. If necessary, cut a very thin slice from the base to help the peppers stand up. Stuff the peppers with the filling and drizzle the tops with olive oil. Put the peppers in an 8 by 8-inch square baking dish. Fill the baking dish with 3/4-inch hot water and bake until the filling is golden and the peppers are cooked through, about 55 to 60 minutes. Cooks Note: If the filling begins to brown too quickly, cover the pan with foil.)
#8 French onion soup
- 4 tablespoons butter
- 1 teaspoon salt
- 4 large onions, thinly sliced (food processor works great)
- 48 fluid ounce's chicken broth
- 14 ounce's beef broth
- 1 tablespoon Worcestershire sauce
- 2 sprigs fresh parsley,1 sprig fresh thyme leaves, 1 bay leaf (dried herbs are fine)
- 1 tablespoon balsamic vinegar
- salt and freshly ground black pepper to taste
- 4 thick slices French or Italian bread
- 8 slices Gruyere or Swiss cheese slices, room temperature
- 1/2 cup shredded mozzarella cheese, room temperature
- 4 pinches paprika
- Melt butter in a large pot over medium-high heat. Stir in salt, red onions and sweet onions. Cook 35 minutes, stirring frequently, until onions are caramelized and almost syrupy.
- Mix chicken broth, beef broth, red wine and Worcestershire sauce into pot. Bundle the parsley, thyme, and bay leaf with twine and place in pot. Simmer over medium heat for 20 minutes, stirring occasionally. Remove and discard the herbs. Reduce the heat to low, mix in vinegar and season with salt and pepper. Cover and keep over low heat to stay hot while you prepare the bread.
- Preheat oven broiler. Arrange bread slices on a baking sheet and broil 3 minutes, turning once, until well toasted on both sides. Remove from heat; do not turn off broiler.
- Arrange 4 large oven safe bowls or crocks on a rimmed baking sheet. Fill each bowl 2/3 full with hot soup. Top each bowl with 1 slice toasted bread, 2 slice Gruyere cheese and 1/4 of the Asiago or mozzarella cheese. Sprinkle a little bit of paprika over the top of each one.
- Broil 5 minutes, or until bubbly and golden brown. As it softens, the cheese will cascade over the sides of the crock and form a beautifully melted crusty seal. Serve immediately!
Thursday, March 31, 2011
My favorite recipes!!!
OK, so I know I take A LOT of pictures of the food I create & cook and post them on my Facebook. because I LOVE FOOD!!! I am a FIRM believer that you eat with your eyes first, then your brain (the description of the dish), and last your taste buds!!! I have tried food that was so beautiful that I had to eat it, but in the back of my mind I knew I wouldn't like it. Which leads to my second firm belief (associated with this blog), you should try everything TWICE. Once is not enough to really explore and enjoy the food, and it may have been prepared poorly. Always, always give it another chance!!!
So, with that said... I have had people request for new recipes that everyday people/wives/mothers like myself can cook easily and enjoy! I have decided to start with these 5 basic recipes on the following criteria: 1) extent and commonality of ingredients 2) ease of preparation and implementation 3) time needed. Layman's terms - These dishes are super easy and still delicious.
#1 - Mustard pork chops with pan sauce
Ingredients: 6-8 Pork chops (any cut), mustard, flour, s&p, cooking oil, 1 family size can of chicken and rice soup, butter
Preparation: Heat large skillet at med/high with enough cooking oil to coat the bottom of the pan. / coat both sides of pork chop with mustard / dredge in seasoned flour / open can of soup
Cooking: Place prepared pork chops into hot skillet (oil will create lines, but not smoking) and cook until they come away from the pan easily and are golden brown. FLIP pork chops and follow same process for the other side. When both sides are browned, immediately put can of soup directly on chops, turn heat to medium and let simmer for 15 min or until pork chops are fully cooked. The soup creates a wonderful pan sauce with NO EFFORT! Add dollop of butter and serve over white rice!
#2 - Chicken and Cheese Enchiladas
Ingredients: 10 burrito sized tortillas, 3 chicken breasts, 1 can of chopped green chilies, 1 can of nacho cheese soup, salsa, shredded cheese, chili powder, s&p
Preparation: Preheat over to 350 degrees. Cook chicken in med/high skillet with chili powder and s&p (to your taste) until down. After cooled, cut chicken into bite size pieces and place in mixing bowl. Cook soup with 1/2 can of milk and place 1/2 into mixing bowl. Warm all tortillas in the microwave for 1-2 min or until soft. Add can of chilies, 2 tbsp chili powder, and 1/2 salsa into mixing bowl. Mix all ingredients in bowl together and roll in tortilla shells. **you can also layer this dish, alternating tortillas and mixture**
Cooking: Place each rolled and stuffed tortilla into a greased (butter) baking dish or cake pan. Cover with remainder of soup and 1/4 salsa. Cook covered with foil for 20-25 min. Uncover and sprinkle with shredded cheese and cook for another 5 min.
#3 - Cheeseburger casserole
Ingredients: 1-2lbs of ground beef, 1 can cream of mushroom soup, 1 pack Velvetta shells and cheese, 1/2 milk, butter, s&p, onion, garlic, & cooking oil.
Preparation/Cooking: Preheat large skillet to med/high and bring water to boil in large saucepan, chop 1/4 cp onion and 3 cloves of garlic, add to oiled skillet until softened, immediately add beef and cook until done. Add shells to water and cook and prepare macaroni. When beef is done, add can of soup and 1/2 milk, stir until combined. Add beef mixture to macaroni and stir. Serve with crescent rolls!
#4 - Slow cooker roast with noodles & gravy
Ingredients: 2-4lb roast (any cut as it will be tender in SC), 1 can each cream of mushroom & french onion, water, s&p, 1 bag frozen egg noodles, beef stock
Preparation/Cooking: place roast in slow cooker on high, add enough water to cover 1/2 the roast and let cook from 8am-4pm. At 4 pm, or somewhere around there, add both cans of soup and turn to low for another 1-2 hours. 20 min before dinner, use beef broth and prepare noodles as described on the package. Serve roast on noodles and add soup gravy on top!
#5 - Pot O' Gold (my fav clean your fridge recipe)
Ingredients: Any 2 meats you have on hand (chicken, sausage, ham, shrimp), peppers, onions, garlic, 1 jar of spaghetti sauce, any short pasta you have on hand.
Preparation/Cooking: Cut all your veggies bite sized and saute in skillet with oil or butter until softened. Cook your 2 meats accordingly and place to the side. Cook pasta in water with salt until done. Add veggies, meat, and spaghetti sauce to pot of pasta and simmer on med/high until warmed through. Serve with garlic or cheesy bread!!
I hope these recipes will make their way into you and your families lives with ease!!!
I plan to continue on this route and post new recipes as often as I can. In the future, I will be adding pictures to this blog because we all know seeing something is SO MUCH EASIER!!!!! I will also start adding recipes that will expand your experience, confidence, and your pallet!! Stick with me, and I can promise you, cooking will become a very rewarding and enjoyable aspect of your life!!!!!
Like they say on the Cooking Channel - STAY HUNGRY!!!!!
So, with that said... I have had people request for new recipes that everyday people/wives/mothers like myself can cook easily and enjoy! I have decided to start with these 5 basic recipes on the following criteria: 1) extent and commonality of ingredients 2) ease of preparation and implementation 3) time needed. Layman's terms - These dishes are super easy and still delicious.
#1 - Mustard pork chops with pan sauce
Ingredients: 6-8 Pork chops (any cut), mustard, flour, s&p, cooking oil, 1 family size can of chicken and rice soup, butter
Preparation: Heat large skillet at med/high with enough cooking oil to coat the bottom of the pan. / coat both sides of pork chop with mustard / dredge in seasoned flour / open can of soup
Cooking: Place prepared pork chops into hot skillet (oil will create lines, but not smoking) and cook until they come away from the pan easily and are golden brown. FLIP pork chops and follow same process for the other side. When both sides are browned, immediately put can of soup directly on chops, turn heat to medium and let simmer for 15 min or until pork chops are fully cooked. The soup creates a wonderful pan sauce with NO EFFORT! Add dollop of butter and serve over white rice!
#2 - Chicken and Cheese Enchiladas
Ingredients: 10 burrito sized tortillas, 3 chicken breasts, 1 can of chopped green chilies, 1 can of nacho cheese soup, salsa, shredded cheese, chili powder, s&p
Preparation: Preheat over to 350 degrees. Cook chicken in med/high skillet with chili powder and s&p (to your taste) until down. After cooled, cut chicken into bite size pieces and place in mixing bowl. Cook soup with 1/2 can of milk and place 1/2 into mixing bowl. Warm all tortillas in the microwave for 1-2 min or until soft. Add can of chilies, 2 tbsp chili powder, and 1/2 salsa into mixing bowl. Mix all ingredients in bowl together and roll in tortilla shells. **you can also layer this dish, alternating tortillas and mixture**
Cooking: Place each rolled and stuffed tortilla into a greased (butter) baking dish or cake pan. Cover with remainder of soup and 1/4 salsa. Cook covered with foil for 20-25 min. Uncover and sprinkle with shredded cheese and cook for another 5 min.
#3 - Cheeseburger casserole
Ingredients: 1-2lbs of ground beef, 1 can cream of mushroom soup, 1 pack Velvetta shells and cheese, 1/2 milk, butter, s&p, onion, garlic, & cooking oil.
Preparation/Cooking: Preheat large skillet to med/high and bring water to boil in large saucepan, chop 1/4 cp onion and 3 cloves of garlic, add to oiled skillet until softened, immediately add beef and cook until done. Add shells to water and cook and prepare macaroni. When beef is done, add can of soup and 1/2 milk, stir until combined. Add beef mixture to macaroni and stir. Serve with crescent rolls!
#4 - Slow cooker roast with noodles & gravy
Ingredients: 2-4lb roast (any cut as it will be tender in SC), 1 can each cream of mushroom & french onion, water, s&p, 1 bag frozen egg noodles, beef stock
Preparation/Cooking: place roast in slow cooker on high, add enough water to cover 1/2 the roast and let cook from 8am-4pm. At 4 pm, or somewhere around there, add both cans of soup and turn to low for another 1-2 hours. 20 min before dinner, use beef broth and prepare noodles as described on the package. Serve roast on noodles and add soup gravy on top!
#5 - Pot O' Gold (my fav clean your fridge recipe)
Ingredients: Any 2 meats you have on hand (chicken, sausage, ham, shrimp), peppers, onions, garlic, 1 jar of spaghetti sauce, any short pasta you have on hand.
Preparation/Cooking: Cut all your veggies bite sized and saute in skillet with oil or butter until softened. Cook your 2 meats accordingly and place to the side. Cook pasta in water with salt until done. Add veggies, meat, and spaghetti sauce to pot of pasta and simmer on med/high until warmed through. Serve with garlic or cheesy bread!!
I hope these recipes will make their way into you and your families lives with ease!!!
I plan to continue on this route and post new recipes as often as I can. In the future, I will be adding pictures to this blog because we all know seeing something is SO MUCH EASIER!!!!! I will also start adding recipes that will expand your experience, confidence, and your pallet!! Stick with me, and I can promise you, cooking will become a very rewarding and enjoyable aspect of your life!!!!!
Like they say on the Cooking Channel - STAY HUNGRY!!!!!
Thursday, February 10, 2011
IM BACK!!!
OK, well I have decided to try this blog thing again! So here is a quick update on my life for the past year...
My husband and I had a beautiful baby girl on September 5th, 2010. We named her Sanae Elyse and she is absolutely the focal point of our lives and our little princess!
Motherhood - SO MUCH HARDER THAN I EVER EXPECTED!!! I'm obviously not a complete idiot, and new that parenthood would forever change our existence as we knew it! BUT, I had no idea how much work and effort it really was. I took 9 weeks off, my husband took 2 weeks off, and my mother stayed with us for the first week. If it has not been for both of them, I think I would have curled up in a ball and cried myself to death. I mean, I had no idea the impact this new bundle of joy would have on my mind, body, and soul. Within the 9 weeks together, Sanae and I got to know, love, and appreciate one another. We found an excellent in home daycare, and Sanae couldn't be happier!! I couldn't even begin to imagine my life without her, she is truly my heart!!!!
So, now that I got that out of the way I plan to resume my blog as I last left it... Talking about ALL THINGS FABULOUS 1) Food 2) Hair 3) and LIFE!!!!!!!!!!!!
My husband and I had a beautiful baby girl on September 5th, 2010. We named her Sanae Elyse and she is absolutely the focal point of our lives and our little princess!
Motherhood - SO MUCH HARDER THAN I EVER EXPECTED!!! I'm obviously not a complete idiot, and new that parenthood would forever change our existence as we knew it! BUT, I had no idea how much work and effort it really was. I took 9 weeks off, my husband took 2 weeks off, and my mother stayed with us for the first week. If it has not been for both of them, I think I would have curled up in a ball and cried myself to death. I mean, I had no idea the impact this new bundle of joy would have on my mind, body, and soul. Within the 9 weeks together, Sanae and I got to know, love, and appreciate one another. We found an excellent in home daycare, and Sanae couldn't be happier!! I couldn't even begin to imagine my life without her, she is truly my heart!!!!
So, now that I got that out of the way I plan to resume my blog as I last left it... Talking about ALL THINGS FABULOUS 1) Food 2) Hair 3) and LIFE!!!!!!!!!!!!
Tuesday, December 22, 2009
Delicious bundles of goodness...
So my husband and I stayed home this past Sunday instead of going home for our regular Sunday Dinner. We figured since we were going to be there for the holidays we might as well get some things around the house done. Well that meant I needed to cook something for Sunday Dinner, which is always a little more special/extravagant then a everyday dinner. We decided on Snow Crab legs, home made cheddar biscuits, and brussels sprouts! I know what you are thinking, brussels sprouts??? Whenever I hear brussels sprouts, I think of the famous vegetable in movies and books that is known for being the worlds worst vegetable. The vegetable all children dreaded... the one they cried over and hid under beds to keep away from! I can honestly say I had no desire, until recently, to try this mystery vegetable! So, I did my usual research and found the most mouth watering recipe courtesy of Emeril Lagasse on FoodNetwork.com - http://www.foodnetwork.com/recipes/emeril-lagasse/bacon-brussels-sprouts-recipe/index.html
I love cooking, so this new found vegetable and of course the complimenting ingredients (onions, garlic, butter & BACON) got me extremely excited! I started off my preparations by making the biscuit dough, SUPER EASY and DELICIOUS recipe - http://www.kraftfoods.com/kf/recipes/easy-bake-cheddar-biscuits-106088.aspx. I also started my HUGE pot of boiling water for the crab legs at this time. After the dough was ready I set it aside to rest while I prepared the ingredients for the brussels sprout dish. I tend to modify recipes according to the size and of course our likings so... I used 2 cloves of garlic, 1/4 cup of sweet onion, 6 slices of smoked bacon, butter, s&p, and sugar. Bacon first then remove, add garlic & onion, remove, brown brussels sprouts, then add bacon and G & O and cook with lid on until tender. While that was cooking, I added 1 lemon's juice and rind, and salt to my boiling water. Then I added the crab legs and let simmer for 10 min. While that was going, I rolled my biscuit dough out and put in the over for 10 min (with a pinch of butter on each biscuit). THEN it was time for dinner...
WAIT - we had to spend 10 minutes cracking the shells of the crab legs with a meat tenderizer and cutting them with scissors! OH there is nothing like being under prepared for cracking crab! We didn't have any of the fancy tools they give you in the restaurant, but believe me, we got every single piece of meat out of there! LOL.
The first bite of brussels sprouts blessed with BACON, butter, onions, and garlic was HEAVEN! And you wouldn't believe the difference a pinch of sugar made! I mean these mystery vegetables were absolutely delicious! Bobby and I raved over them for at least 10 minutes while we ate! The cheddar biscuits were also delectable if I say so myself. The crab legs... well who has had bad crab legs? Not anyone I know!!
So, next time you are looking for a new vegetable try this brussels sprout recipe! I mean, technically its a vegetable so its great for you (just forget about the fat in the bacon and butter, LOL)! But literally, it is probably one of the best vegetable dishes I have had in a long time (unless you consider bacon or cheese a vegetable!)
Oh to my new found delicious bundles of goodness... the Brussels Sprout!
As always... Keep it real, keep it positive, keep it FABULOUS!!!
I love cooking, so this new found vegetable and of course the complimenting ingredients (onions, garlic, butter & BACON) got me extremely excited! I started off my preparations by making the biscuit dough, SUPER EASY and DELICIOUS recipe - http://www.kraftfoods.com/kf/recipes/easy-bake-cheddar-biscuits-106088.aspx. I also started my HUGE pot of boiling water for the crab legs at this time. After the dough was ready I set it aside to rest while I prepared the ingredients for the brussels sprout dish. I tend to modify recipes according to the size and of course our likings so... I used 2 cloves of garlic, 1/4 cup of sweet onion, 6 slices of smoked bacon, butter, s&p, and sugar. Bacon first then remove, add garlic & onion, remove, brown brussels sprouts, then add bacon and G & O and cook with lid on until tender. While that was cooking, I added 1 lemon's juice and rind, and salt to my boiling water. Then I added the crab legs and let simmer for 10 min. While that was going, I rolled my biscuit dough out and put in the over for 10 min (with a pinch of butter on each biscuit). THEN it was time for dinner...
WAIT - we had to spend 10 minutes cracking the shells of the crab legs with a meat tenderizer and cutting them with scissors! OH there is nothing like being under prepared for cracking crab! We didn't have any of the fancy tools they give you in the restaurant, but believe me, we got every single piece of meat out of there! LOL.
The first bite of brussels sprouts blessed with BACON, butter, onions, and garlic was HEAVEN! And you wouldn't believe the difference a pinch of sugar made! I mean these mystery vegetables were absolutely delicious! Bobby and I raved over them for at least 10 minutes while we ate! The cheddar biscuits were also delectable if I say so myself. The crab legs... well who has had bad crab legs? Not anyone I know!!
So, next time you are looking for a new vegetable try this brussels sprout recipe! I mean, technically its a vegetable so its great for you (just forget about the fat in the bacon and butter, LOL)! But literally, it is probably one of the best vegetable dishes I have had in a long time (unless you consider bacon or cheese a vegetable!)
Oh to my new found delicious bundles of goodness... the Brussels Sprout!
As always... Keep it real, keep it positive, keep it FABULOUS!!!
Friday, December 18, 2009
Life Questions: Are you just being nosy???
Ok, I'm sure I am not the only one out there who gets the life questions... I am not sure if anyone ever thought about this, but it seems like something totally worth talking about.
Here are a few of the life questions I am talking about. (in a high pitched, irritating voice) "When are you going to get married", "When are you going to have children", "When are you going to buy a home", "When are you...". Listen people, these are questions that not only make people extremely uncomfortable, but they make the people receiving the questions feel like they aren't meeting "Societies" standards! Because they aren't married or starting a family in a new home, something is wrong with them and they are failing at life? Think about what you are asking... You are asking someone to tell you very personal information about their lives. You are asking people to talk to you about things they don't even want to talk about with their partners, parents, or friends. What gives you the right to hear that information? Are you just being nosy... Are you trying to make yourself feel like you have a more "successful" life?
Think about it for a moment... What if you asked someone "So, when are you going to get married? What are you waiting for?" and that person replied, "Well, my boyfriend cheated on me with a skank at a strip club and then left me with a $10K debt and took everything we owned with him". OR what if they replied "Sorry, they haven't actually made it legal in this state for me to declare my happiness." WHAT ARE YOU GOING TO SAY NOW?? What will your reaction be when you have just asked that person something that requires their personal life to be explained in 2 min answer? Did you just ruin their day, their week, their month?
What if you asked someone "So, when are you going to have kids? What are you waiting for?" and that person immediately started sobbing and walked away? OR what if that person replied "I have had 3 miscarriages over the past year and my doctor just told me I couldn't have children". OR "Actually we have been trying for over a year, thanks for asking (smart ass tone)." What do you say now???
What if you asked someone "So, do you still live in the same place? Are you all planning on buying a home anytime soon? You know with that tax credit now is the time to do it" and they replied "We are actually broke, we owe the IRS $64K and they are garnishing our wages... we can barely keep the heat on". OR "We are seperated and filing for divorce" OR "My identity was stolen a year ago and now my credit score is 385, I cant get a loan"! What do you say now?
If you think about it, you just asked someone the most personal issues in their lives. Do you think you have a right to ask them that? Do you really want to know the answer?
Here are some examples to think hard about before you ask:
1) When are you getting married
2) When are you having children
3) When are you buying a home
4) Are you ever going to find a boyfriend/girlfriend
5) How much money do you make a year?
If you just want to make small talk and make people feel like you are genuinely interested in what is going on in their life, try asking some basic questions.
Here are a few of the life questions I am talking about. (in a high pitched, irritating voice) "When are you going to get married", "When are you going to have children", "When are you going to buy a home", "When are you...". Listen people, these are questions that not only make people extremely uncomfortable, but they make the people receiving the questions feel like they aren't meeting "Societies" standards! Because they aren't married or starting a family in a new home, something is wrong with them and they are failing at life? Think about what you are asking... You are asking someone to tell you very personal information about their lives. You are asking people to talk to you about things they don't even want to talk about with their partners, parents, or friends. What gives you the right to hear that information? Are you just being nosy... Are you trying to make yourself feel like you have a more "successful" life?
Think about it for a moment... What if you asked someone "So, when are you going to get married? What are you waiting for?" and that person replied, "Well, my boyfriend cheated on me with a skank at a strip club and then left me with a $10K debt and took everything we owned with him". OR what if they replied "Sorry, they haven't actually made it legal in this state for me to declare my happiness." WHAT ARE YOU GOING TO SAY NOW?? What will your reaction be when you have just asked that person something that requires their personal life to be explained in 2 min answer? Did you just ruin their day, their week, their month?
What if you asked someone "So, when are you going to have kids? What are you waiting for?" and that person immediately started sobbing and walked away? OR what if that person replied "I have had 3 miscarriages over the past year and my doctor just told me I couldn't have children". OR "Actually we have been trying for over a year, thanks for asking (smart ass tone)." What do you say now???
What if you asked someone "So, do you still live in the same place? Are you all planning on buying a home anytime soon? You know with that tax credit now is the time to do it" and they replied "We are actually broke, we owe the IRS $64K and they are garnishing our wages... we can barely keep the heat on". OR "We are seperated and filing for divorce" OR "My identity was stolen a year ago and now my credit score is 385, I cant get a loan"! What do you say now?
If you think about it, you just asked someone the most personal issues in their lives. Do you think you have a right to ask them that? Do you really want to know the answer?
Here are some examples to think hard about before you ask:
1) When are you getting married
2) When are you having children
3) When are you buying a home
4) Are you ever going to find a boyfriend/girlfriend
5) How much money do you make a year?
If you just want to make small talk and make people feel like you are genuinely interested in what is going on in their life, try asking some basic questions.
Here are some great examples to try:
1) Hi, how is your day going?
2) So, do you have any plans for the weekend?
3) How is it going? How is everything in your world, anything new or exciting?
4) Hey! I saw you got a dog (on FB), how is that working out for you?
5) How are you?
So, hopefully next time you see someone and just want to be nosy... You will look back and think about this blog and realize that if those people wanted to talk to you about something personal, they would have. If those people don't want to talk to you about something personal, they wont. A great conversation always starts with a simple "How are you", where it goes from there depends on the amount of trust/compassion/comfort. Remember, you cant force trust, compassion, or comfort. see "Keep it real or keep it moving" for more about this ;), it has to happen in time. Try to think about the things coming out of you mouth before you say them...
As always... Keep it real, keep it positive, keep it FABULOUS!!!
Wednesday, December 16, 2009
Day 2: Keep it real or keep it moving!!!
What is "Keeping it Real"? If you Google the term, you get a wide variety of answers to this question. http://www.google.com/search?hl=en&rlz=1C1CHNB_en___US338&q=definition+of+keeping+it+real&aq=f&oq=&aqi=
What does keeping it real or keep it moving mean to me? It means that I stay true to myself and use honesty (not cruelty) as my greatest tool, and I try not to say anything about someone that I wouldn't say to their face. If I cant do that, I dont waste my time pretending, I just move on.
A couple examples to get us started:
Question: Leeann, how does this shirt look with these jeans?
Answer: Hummm... It looks ok. Why dont you try this pair of jeans though.
What that person got out of my answer: It looks ok, but not fabulous. CHANGE
Question: Leeann, I slept with 4 people in the last week. Do you think people consider me a hoe?
Answer: Well, you aren't making the best impression on people or the best decisions for your life. Maybe you should practice abstinence for like...EVER
What that person got out of my answer: Ummm yea!!!
Question: Leeann, did you see Pam's status on Facebook. Wow, she is so ridiculously stupid. I hope she looses that fancy new job and wrecks her car into a tree (laughter). I mean, out of all people SHE got that job! I cant wait until her new boss figures out shes a big trash bag and will sleep with every man that walks by!! Have you talked to her lately?
Answer: Megan, is this what you do all day? Stalk people on Facebook (mutual laughter)??? Yea, I talked to her and told her congrats on the new job. You know she has been out of work for like 3 months. I think she almost lost her car! I would hate to be in that situation wouldn't you? I'm sure their were a lot of people more qualified then her for that job, and yea sometimes she is a big trash bag but she still beat everyone else out of that job... Guess she has something good to offer.
What that person got out of my answer: Grow up and stop hating on other peoples accomplishments. If you aren't happy, don't bring everyone else down with you! And FYI - I probably just cut you out of the circle for at least 1 month (Im just keeping it moving)!
So, now that you know what I mean when I say "Keeping it Real" we can continue with our conversation. I like to think of myself as an expert, and expert at being ME. This came with 28 years and a MASSIVE amount of time spent with trial and error! And over those 28 years, I learned (often the hard way) that you have to keep it real. If you cant keep it real with someone, what is the point in even continuing the relationship. Whether the relationship is friend, family, or acquaintance... If you cant keep it real with them, isnt it a big fat waste of your time and theirs?? So, if you are wasting your time as we speak with that annoying co-worker who you feel like you have to be nice to, STOP. Instead of "acting" like you want to be their friend, try just a quick smile or hello and keep it moving. Doing this, you saved yourself 10 min of pointless conversation followed by 10 min of frustration because you just wasted 10 min!
People who don't keep it real are often surrounded by karma, bad karma! These are the people who sit around and talk about other people, but would never say anything to their face. They are the people who choose to gossip and stir the pot just because! If you take a good look at these people, they are often unhappy with something in their life and rather than confronting their issue, they chose to highlight other peoples flaws or problems. This type of behavior starts a chain of events, which usually ends horribly bad. You have to realize and understand that life is always going to be easier if you communicate, say it with me people COM MUN ICATE, your views/problems/issues with those people. They will not only value you for your honesty, but they will respect you for coming to them. Yes, it is true... Good Communication = Mutual Respect. You respect the person for listening to your view, and they respect you for coming to them in a professional/adult manner. So keep it real, or keep it moving!!!!!
Remember, there is a difference between venting and gossiping. Venting should be done with someone that will only listen and understand, no opinions should be shared. Venting should also be kept to a MAXIMUM of 5 minutes. Anything longer than 5 minutes is now considered gossip. Keep that in mind people, its very important.
Remember, there is a difference between venting and gossiping. Venting should be done with someone that will only listen and understand, no opinions should be shared. Venting should also be kept to a MAXIMUM of 5 minutes. Anything longer than 5 minutes is now considered gossip. Keep that in mind people, its very important.
So, after reading this entry... Do you feel like you can "Keep it Real or Keep it Moving" with the people that surround your life?
Remember... Keep it real, keep it positive, keep it FABULOUS!!!
"How people treat you is their karma; how you react is yours." - Wayne Dyer
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